Crooked

Crooked: something bent, not straight, twisted and misaligned.  Not truthful, not open or upfront. Does life get this way sometimes when we continue to brush things under the rug and not communicate and then when we do the perceived straight path goes into some jagged, crooked, crooked road that we don't even recognize?  Loosing ground beneath our feet and feeling like we've taken so many steps back after working so hard to make the ones that brought us forward. Commitment to doing what is right, making good choices so as to not hurt someone else or yourself.  Crookedness is a barrier, a big hurdle to jump over rather than become or go through because it tears down all you've built in time in a  split second and leaves you feeling less than you are.  Part of humanness.  When you do something wrong and need to build back up, it builds strength, courage and determination. It builds compassion for others going through their crooked paths.  I'm jumping over it and leaving it all behind for working with all that has been given  me…all the gifts of my family and the people in my life, my inner gifts and love I have deep down that will pull me out of this dark feeling that I'm bad, not good enough and always doing wrong… some old belief pattern instilled when I was a young girl or perhaps a past life.  I do good in the world and will continue to do good, without hurting others.  This is the road I walk.

Have a great one...
www.lynnhollyfield.com

A Voucher*

A promise of something to come later, that's not quite ready, but you've earned it.  A gift of sorts, packed in waiting.  The contents dictate the longing for, the anticipation of, the expectations of what will be fulfilled when presenting it for an exchange. The end result of negotiation.   She knew she'd have to hold this for a long time, but there was no expiration date.  It may get tattered along the way, forgotten and tucked away in a box for some rainy day perusal.  But there was one stipulation. It can be traded in, only when the time is right for all and the stars are aligned.  

*I'm trying a morning writing practice and the past several posts have been from prompts by Peggy Tabor Millin, Clarity Works, Inc.  Check her out. Enjoying this and it's becoming a part of the day I really look forward to!

Supposed to….

Woke up to unfolded laundry on the couch, a semi clean kitchen and week of new assignments for work, plus juggling Driver's Ed classes, swim team practices, meals, tending the miraculous garden and feeding all the critters.  Yet here I am writing, to start my week with words, ones that will inspired me to keep focused on a truer path, full of heart and soul and love. No blue skies this morning…The woods are still, against a white dawn sky…more rain today after the buckets that poured down last night.  The lush green, swallows me up, so rare for mid July here, so unlike the years past in drought.  There is a gentle flicker of movement as two birds find there way back to their nest.  As I must soon go to tend mine…the gentlest breeze enticing the leaves to move as I watch their subtle shimmer of them holding on to the drops of last nights rain.  Holding on to the beauty as the nudge of the percolator and time on the clock push to organize for tasks ahead, I hold the lush green stillness inside.

Shattered

Shattered

Life is fragile. We  wake up each day with all our dreams, thoughts and jobs in our back pack, thrown in with a bit of inspiration and head out for the day.  Keeping it all positive and open always feels best…seems things flow and connect and are on the same wavelength. Then why do we get so sidetracked by someone who must start their day very differently? Is it the challenge before  me  that sets me on a mission to try to help them see another way-that desire to help them, cause life is too short to live such a negative, narrow spin?  We've all been there in that closed, dark space where we seem to not be understood or heard.  And what rescues us? A stranger's smile, an offer to help, a kind touch, a hawk flying across our path, a lovely memory, a friend who sits and listens? Or simply waking up the next morning, determined to live a better way; to see the beauty in things…even in the challenges that brought us to this place where we stand, right now.  My teeny world and the confrontations I encounter are so small yet feel devastating at times.  But when I peel back and reach deep down, I know what I want to create, I know how I want to live and I know what I need. Today, I'm setting out with a lot of belief that life is to be lived to it's fullest, that every moment is precious, that love surrounds us all and can be seen if we remain open and focused.  Pieces are coming back together, determined not to be shattered…thank you beautiful, blue skies this morning!

Whistlin' and Fishin' in Heaven

It would be 28 years ago that my Dad left this planet….he was 59 and I was 24.  I can't believe so much time has passed since that night.  My brother Rob and I sat up with my Dad.   I had my guitar in hand and we sang every Harry Chapin and John Prine song we knew.  The one that sticks the most in my memory is 'Fish and Whistle.'  A great John Prine song that just fit the closeness of that moment, of just being there, not knowing when Dad would slip away.  The chorus: "Father forgive us for what we must do; you forgive us, we'll forgive you.  We'll forgive each other 'til we both turn blue and we'll go whistlin' and fishin' in heaven…"  My Dad loved  to fish and it was just the perfect song other than when I woke up in the middle of the night to give Dad a dose of pain medicine and heard Jackson Browne's "Rock me on the Water" only to find Dad had passed on into the universe.  Thinking of you, Dad,  and I smile with the thought that you are 'whistlin and fishin' in heaven.' Miss you…

I wrote a song for Dad a few years back: Another Time  (it's the last song down the list...take a listen if you have a chance at this link:  http://www.reverbnation.com/lynnhollyfield/songs  )

The truth is...The truth is in the flower. The blossom and its drive to fully open with the morning light. No one to please. On a mission and knowing exactly what to do-blossom, perfect symmetry, unfolding in the sun. But what is truth but doing what you are driven to do. No derailment in the stars just one clear path to your destiny to blossom and create beauty in the world. The truth is that we are drawn to the light of the sun, the stars, the reflection on the ripples in the water, to the light found in someone's eyes or in another's heart. The truth is it just happens...it is what it is...it is what it is about to be without distraction, it's the lovely words that spill into our minds. When we are open, free and not clouded by illusion. The truth is we already know, we just need to let it be and not question. We need to let our truth surface. It is always there...sometimes hidden or covered by layers of cloth/threads from life that have been woven over time and then form a pattern and strong fabric that warms and comforts us. The truth is we need to let the threads form in a way that we can still breathe, that we are not stifeld or weighed down...but that it is just right because it was created with open mind, open heart, love, trust, without judgement....with life inind-living, thinking, breathing in the light to the rosebud within-letting it blossom in time.

Late Summertime....

A beautiful late summer morning...I love this time of year....something shifts at the beginning of August and I feel kind of lost but there are signs of things slowly but surely coming into place...things that have been stirring deep and are all starting to come together.  Chinese Medicine talks about the 5th season of Late Summer....a time of transition...the change from the long, hot summer days as we move towards the beginning of Autumn.  There's also a kind of melancholy that comes...I wonder if it's a throw back to the feeling of the summer ending and having to go back to school.  We have a hickory tree in front of our house.   It's peppered with red leaves and every now and then sends one floating down and they land on my car.  I'm reminded of the change as I head out from home and the leaves go flying and are scattered once again...sort of how I feel....focused and ready, then flying and scattered....ahh the beauty and mystery of Late Summertime.  Late Summertime is a song I wrote on one of these beautiful late Summer days...take a listen when you get chance~www.reverbnation.com/lynnhollyfield.